The Body House

Sensual Life Advice For Men

Energy of The Modern Gender Polarities From The Relaters Manual – Part #1B (VIDEO)

Take a look at the video below to understand the differences between the sexes and why they are necessary.

To understand the physical brain differences between the genders click this link…

 

 

 

MODERN Gender Polarity

 

In modern times, being a man or a woman looks different than it did in the past. Men and women have nearly every opportunity open to them in life. In their personal lives though, there are still big differences. For happy relating it needs to stay that way.

 

The Feminine Safe House

 

Men must genuinely respect women, not just pretend to. Why? Because when a man has real respect for a woman’s point of view and feminine ways, he’s motivated to keep her safe. Protecting and keeping the feminine energy in a woman safe, sounds like a terrible cliché. However, this is a pillar of modern gender polarities.

 

When a man provides a feeling of safety in a woman it makes her stronger. Girls who grow up with protective and respectful fathers often have a much easier time in relationships. That measure of safety her father gave allowed the girl to understand herself and listen to her inner voice.

Without fully functioning intuition we tend to make awful decisions. So, as her man you can remedy that. When a man makes his woman feels safe and supported, there is little she WON’T do for him at that point.

Here’s a big secret… women WANT to GIVE to their men.

 

We’re dying to… aching to, but we’re not going to if we feel you don’t have genuine respect for us. Otherwise we might as well be slaves, right? We want to lavish you guys with sex appeal and nurturance, and love. We really do. If your woman isn’t willing to please you it’s probably because you’ve shown her you don’t respect or appreciate who she is as a woman.

 

More than likely you haven’t demonstrated the little things daily that let her know how much you value her as the unique and special person she is to you. Don’t make her feel like she could be one of many. If you do, one of two things will happen; she’ll become resentful of you and stay in the relationship or she’ll become resentful of you and leave. Either way that’s not the goal here.

 

Real, lasting transformation happens in subtle ways. A big dramatic breakthrough rarely comes. We’ve been trained to think that big things happen in big splashy ways. It rarely does. Shifting your thinking, feeling and energy toward respecting women more, is the way to true long-lasting positive change in your relationships.

 

The Gift of Crazy

Our inner voice is the only navigational tool we get when we arrive on this planet. Sometimes we hear it clearly and other times it’s fuzzy. Being fully present in our lives helps us listen to our intuition and gives us clarity. For women, hearing our inner voices clearly is especially true during our menstrual cycles. A woman becomes much more attuned to her intuition, as well as, more sensitive to inner and external stimuli during her monthly cycle.

 

As a man, you’ll want to be extra aware of her needs during this time and extra gentle. Often times issues that lay buried deep within her psyche will rise up during her monthly cycle that make her seem ‘crazy’. You can learn a lot about your lady during this time by just paying attention. Notice unusual things about her during this time that don’t show up at other times.

 

For example, she may be much less talkative than usual. She may seek more solitude than normal. She may mention past dramatic events she never has before. She may get irritable or sad and depressed easily when normally she isn’t. My point is, you can learn and become closer to your lady during this time if you are gentle and attentive. Just give her what she needs and demand nothing. This is a moment you can be her hero and champion.

 

I must emphasize that everything is magnified for a woman during her cycle. So, if you are even slightly critical or aggressive you can do more damage than you know. However, if your sensitive to where she’s at, the conversations you have during this intuitively heightened time can be fruitful. These talks often set you up for greater connection and better sex for the rest of the month.

 

When you allow the subtleties from her view point to emerge, your lady can become a trusted navigator in your life. She can see things from an angle you couldn’t possibly see on your own. Wouldn’t you like a bird’s eye view of that tense work or family situation? A viewpoint which is objective and perceptive offered with compassion and without judgement? That is the kind of irreplaceable insight you’ll be cultivating when you support her in the most gentle and protective way possible during her cycle.

 

So, for many reasons, this ‘crazy’ time of the month for a woman is also quite powerful. If you can understand this crazy you can learn a lot from it. For too long this state of crazy has been under appreciated by men and women.

Stand In The Storm

Knowing how and when to get very still is a an important part of being a man. Unfortunately, too many men don’t master this self-authority skill and don’t see the necessity too. Since many women get thrown around internally every month by extra hormonal sensitivity (among other things) women must know how to get still and ultimately, mature.

 

When a man doesn’t get still and instead flies off the handle or leaves, you make us even crazier at anytime of the month. So, when you see your woman (or any woman) getting to the edge of her crazy… stop. Get grounded, get still, and get focused. You’re preparing for a possible storm. You’re not readying yourself for a fight… that’s the last thing you want to do. The other last thing, that really should be the last thing you do… is leave.

 

You’re waiting for a storm not a fight. It’s futile to fight a hurricane, but you can wait it out in the right place. Her turbulence may blow over quickly. If it doesn’t, don’t run and don’t confront. You’ll create more problems for the both of you if you do.

 

Women hate to feel abandoned so, don’t say or do anything that belittles her current state of mind. She’ll more than likely take it personally and conclude you’re taking sides against her. Have some empathy. She’s obviously struggling with something. Don’t make her wrong for feeling the way she does. Fighting is never a good option anyway. It creates more tension and steals your dignity.

 

Female Impotence

 

When you’re dealing with a woman and you start to feel caught between a rock and a hard place, it could be because that’s exactly where she wants you. Why? Because woman often feel caught between a rock and a hard place and blame men for it. In some ways, this is completely unfair and yet, there is good reason for it.

 

This world is made for and run by men. It’s been that way for thousands of years and will continue to for many more. You personally can not be blamed for that. However, taking responsibility as a member of the ruling ‘tribe’ is important.

 

Women often feel stuck, unworthy, unattractive, completely powerless and useless in getting their particular ideas, and talents out into this masculine run world in a substantial way. This is a very touchy and involved aspect of being a woman. I won’t spend a lot of time on it here, but please be aware many woman feel this way even if they can’t articulate it.

 

Just keep in mind there is such a thing as “female impotence” and it’s got NOTHING to do with sex.

Female Impotence = The feeling a woman has when she can’t find a way to give substantially of herself in a way that’s valued by others.

 

Many women see men as having a much easier time in the world while they walk around in a constant state of low-level frustration because she can’t find a way to give what she has to offer to the world. Remember, a woman’s way of being has subtly and detail men are unaware of.

When a woman feels she can’t give to the world in a substantial way, she experiences the rejection as a personal attack by the world. Men tend to take worldly rejection as an attack on their image and how others see them. The difference being men think people view him in a bad light. Whereas women think people view her as a bad person. See the difference?

Gender Polarity and Modern Male Energy

What’s A Man To Do?

 

If you truly want to relate to women better then you’ll need to get stronger. Being a strong man has a lot to do with managing yourself. How much in charge of your own emotions and thoughts are you? I used to see a lot of men in my massage sessions who had no idea how to relax and let go. Having control over yourself means keeping your internal state the way you want. Which is happy, positive and relaxed.

 

It means not letting the world and the people in it rock your balanced center. A truly calm and cool guy is always attractive to women. Managing your own mind and emotions is a life long battle, but it must be done to have better relationships with women.

 

Try to see the petty annoyances with your lady as scenarios for growth and maturity within yourself. Don’t let yourself get triggered. Try looking at your relationship as a vehicle to becoming a better man internally, without the need for external drama. When you do, relating becomes an adventure.

 

Let’s take a look at an example. You’re out at your favorite watering hole with your lady. You start talking about Bob the big know-it-all from work. You tell her how Bob, once again, tried to one up you in a meeting that day. He was trying to take credit for your great idea that landed your office the big client.

 

In response, your lady waves her hand, rolls her eyes and peruses the bar menu while wondering out loud how the chicken pot pie is. You immediately feel put off and want to snipe at her. Maybe you want to give her an insult? Maybe you want to leave? Whatever you’re feeling just sit with it for a moment or two before indulging in reactive behavior. Notice what happens.

 

These are your thoughts and emotions and they’re valid. However, a negative response is never the best way to handle it. What kind of man do you want to be? Do you want to be the guy that flies off the handle over small stuff? Do you want to be the insulting jerk?

 

Or do you want to be the rock solid guy you know deep down you can be and the kind of man she wants and needs. A woman will respect a man more when he has clear boundaries and knows exactly what he wants and says so. If you can’t stand up to her how can she count on you to stand up for her. Arguing is never the road to go down. Always stay calm. Always try to diffuse a situation without being condescending.

 

It’s moments like that which separate the men from the boys. If you can stand up to your own lady without getting aggressive and without running away, she’ll thank you. Even if she doesn’t you can still feel good about honoring yourself.

Quick Stats

 

Here’s a quick overview of the evidence of abuse in the US. It’s important to know these statistics so you know what you’re dealing with. Especially, in light of all the accusations toward so many men we are hearing about these days in the news.

 

The cold hard fact is, most women you know have suffered sexual and/or physical abuse at the hands of a male. The #MeToo Movement is a testament to this. I always believed that almost every young woman, up to her early 20s, has had at least one incident of serious sexual harassment. The following stats are the most recent I could find.

 

{#MeToo began in the wake of the Harvey Weinstein scandal in April of 2017.}

  • National statistics indicate 1 in 5 girls and 1 in 20 boys is a victim of child sexual abuse in America. This is in light of the fact that the majority of sexual and physical abuse incidents go unreported.
  • The abusers are people they know: 3 out of 4 teens who had been sexually assaulted were victimized by someone they knew. Often times, the people victimizing these kids were someone they knew well, such as a relative, neighbor or babysitter.
  • Stats tell us children who experienced rape or an attempted rape in their teenage years ran the risk of being assaulted again within a few years while attending college. They become almost 14 times more likely to experience another rape or attempted rape in their freshman year.

Can you see a pattern developing here? Once a person is victimized… it becomes a way of being. A way of thinking about yourself and the world around you. Victims of abuse walk around with holes in them. They are less protected psychologically and energetically. Despite their best efforts to protect themselves, they are still more likely to be abused again than those who’ve never been abused.

The Aftermath

 

These national statistics show there are lingering effects of sexual and physical abuse. The resulting psychological damage done to these kids lasts for years afterward. The symptoms tend to show up most dramatically when the individual has a romantic relationship.

 

Prolonged sexual abuse over years is even more devastating: When a child suffers prolonged, sexual abuse over years, they usually develop a negatively distorted view of themselves, a sense of worthlessness, as well as, an excessive interest in sex.

 

Often, a child will become mistrustful of adults or authority figures and even become suicidal. That’s an awful lot to deal with when you’re just a child. Prolonged abuse changes a child forever. As they become adults they’ll have to work very hard to find their peace of mind and a solid sense of self worth.

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  • Physical and verbal fights in the home raise chances of abuse: Living situations where children experience a lot of verbal and physical confrontations makes them more likely to be abused. This is especially true if there’s just one parent in the home due to divorce or abandonment.
  • Since the divorce rate is more that 50% in the U.S. it’s certain there are millions of children sitting ripe for abuse. It also means there are millions of adults (mostly women) who are the survivors of abuse.
  • Many teenagers who date in high school are victims of their boyfriends and sometimes girlfriends violent acts. The ramifications of this puts teens at higher risk for substance abuse, eating disorders, dangerous sexual behavior and future domestic violence. It makes teen girls 6 times more likely to become pregnant and twice as likely to get an STI.

Use Protection

 

These statistics are on top of the fact that women in American culture and most every culture around the world, are bombarded with negative male interactions.

From the work place, to the home, to walking down the street, women encounter numerous experiences with men which are laced with condescension, objectification, manipulation and displays of ego.

I include these stats not to create pity for women or to denigrate men. It’s to illustrate points and get the facts up front. Any way you slice it, men are mostly the ones responsible for the abuses to humanity.

 

We need to do better. Physical and sexual abuse take it’s toll on the body, mind and spirit and changes a person. It stays with you. It changes you. Since we know now that most women have experienced some form of abuse at the hands of men it makes your relating that much more difficult.

So in the wake of this, my hope is to encourage you to invoke your natural desire to be protective of women. We need the good men in the world to support women and call out their brothers.

 

Abuse leaves a woman unprotected and feeling unsafe. It rattles her inner being to its core making it extremely difficult to hear her own intuitive voice. The more intimate your relationship with a woman, the more important it is to make her feel safe in your presence. One of the best and most immediate ways to make your woman feel safe is to start performing random acts of chivalry on a daily basis.

 

Links To Sources

 

http://science.howstuffworks.com/life/men-women-different-brains1.html

https://www.livestrong.com/article/81868-parts-brain-influence-creativity/

http://www.webmd.com/balance/features/how-male-female-brains-differ http://www.brainfitnessforlife.com/9-differences-between-the-male-and-female-brain/ http://www.theguardian.com/science/brain-flapping/2013/dec/04/male-female-brains-real-differences http://www.victimsofcrime.org/media/reporting-on-child-sexual-abuse/child-sexual-abuse-statistics http://www.loveisrespect.org/is-this-abuse/dating-violence-statistics

http://www.togetherforwomen.org

http://www.feminist.com/antiviolence/facts.html

http://eros-therapy.com/female-sexuality/

http://health.howstuffworks.com/sexual-health/sexuality/brain-during-orgasm2.htm http://www.bjs.gov/content/pub/pdf/wo.pdf


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