Comply, Deny & No Reply:

Inside the Mind of Melania Trump

 

To comply, deny and not reply are the psychological tools of women who deal with hyper-dominant or ‘alpha’ males on the regular.

I felt the need to write this article because of a recent client encounter.

He was, in many ways, your typical ‘alpha’ male – a term which I find stupid and demeaning to men. As an aside, I also think ‘beta’ male is a stupid and demeaning term as well.

Allow me to explain.

So this client did something really dumb upon arrival at the location.

Long story short, I sent text directions from a major shopping center to get to where I am (as I do with all clients). It’s literally 2 blocks from the major, can’t miss it, multi store complex.

It’s right on the corner. They are both one way streets.

9 times out of 10 the guys find it easily. It’s the guys who over think it that mess up.

I will say I was really unsure about this guy before he even arrived.

On the phone he sounded like kind of a dope and a jerk, but he said he had received a recommendation from a previous (and respectful) client.

The reference checked out. So, I gave him leeway I wouldn’t have otherwise.

A Quick Run Down

He arrived nearly a half hour late because he said he couldn’t find the place. He said he read the directions. He called three times and I called him once. Each time I went over it and over it.

It’s just two blocks. [!]

These directions are really tough to screw up. The only way to go wrong is if you aren’t thinking straight. He obviously wasn’t.

When he finally arrived he began walking toward the building and waved at a car passing by and said something to the effect, “Oh yeah, thanks. I found it.”

Apparently, he’d asked for directions from someone only a half a block away!

To say this was an egregious breech of discretion would be an understatement.

You can’t un-ring that bell. Ugh.

I almost didn’t take him for the session.

However, I decided to do it anyway.  I did try to impress upon him (as nicely as possible) that he had compromised my location because he didn’t read or listen to the directions (over and over and over…).

He did NOT apologize.

He just kept justifying why he couldn’t find it. He really wasn’t getting it so, I left it alone and gave him the best massage I could.

The conversation was pretty good. I did my best to keep tension at bay. However, there was a small disagreement at the end.

He then told me, “You need to relax.”    Ironic to say the least.

So I said, “Are you married?”

He said, “No.”

I said, “I’m not surprised.”   Snarky to say the least. I’d had it.

This guy had seriously compromised my location without so much as an apology or shred of conciliation. I think I treated him very well under the circumstances.

The Kicker…

But here’s the kicker… As he was leaving he decided to tell me, “Oh, by the way, I am married and have four kids.”

Uhm…

So what? …

Who cares? …

You still aren’t getting it.

 

I didn’t actually say any of those things since I was just glad he was leaving… but it brings me to a point I’d like to make about the female mind.

Melania Trump is a very good example of this.

For a woman to actually live and raise kids with a man who has shown a complete stranger HE sought out for a sensual service and compromise her location and justify his stupidity, speaks volumes about HER frame of mind.

Basically, she must agree with him A LOT or argue A LOT. There wouldn’t be that much middle ground here. How could there be? He’s demonstrated it’s going to be his way. Period.

To live with a man like this day after day, she must comply with his statements, deny she actually sees or hears him do the stupid stuff he says and does and make no reply when she can’t muster up the first two.

Otherwise how else could she stand him?

That must be how Melania does it.

Early Childhood Education

Women get trained early on how to mold themselves to satisfy the male ego.

It’s not always said in so many words, but kids do what they see. Little girls watch mom and dad interact. Little girls want to please their fathers.

Little girls are often trained to shape their behavior to daddy’s mood and whims.

In fact, little girls get so good at knowing when to stay silent, when to be playful, when not to question, and when to go away – all in the name of trying to keep (read: get) daddy’s approval she forgets about herself.

To be so adept at navigating daddy’s moods she must over ride her own instincts every single day.

Is it any wonder that when a little girl in an environment like this hits puberty she fawns over the first boy who gives her a compliment?

Wow! Daddy/boy at school —> gave her approval!

Many young women end up giving their hearts, bodies and souls to young men in search of that approval for nothing in return.

It often takes many years for a young girl to “find” herself. Usually after much heartache and abuse from men.

Something Greater

It doesn’t have to be that way. Yet some women get so used to it.

They have shunted their own inner voice for such a long time they’ve become comfortable with not knowing how they really feel about things.

Although, not knowing yourself makes it that much easier to support your husband when he does or says something stupid, mean, selfish or completely off the mark.

Not knowing herself makes it much easier for a woman to comply to his statements, deny she understands his culpability or just not reply.

Just stand there and smile, honey and look good doing it too. There are many Melania Trumps in the world.

Obviously I know nothing about Melania Trump that can’t be found on Youtube.

Although, from what we’ve seen of her husband (our #45), we know he can’t stand much opposition to his views, needs and desires.

He doesn’t like opposition from men, certainly not from women and especially not from the women closest to him.

So in the end, in my experience, there seems to be many millions of men who love a woman by their sides who agree with them nearly 100% of the time, ignores them when they boast or brood and know when to just keep their mouth shut.

Amen, right gentlemen?

Bad News For Everyone

If that’s the case… then that’s bad news for everybody.

There was a period in my life I tried to stop listening to myself to gain greater approval from men.

I really did try the comply, deny and no reply tactics.

It didn’t work very well. Mostly because it didn’t work well for either one of us. Men or women.

It seemed that many men backed most women into an impossible corner.

Women are damned if we do and damned if we don’t. Men make sure of it.

So if you’re a man who prefers to be around women who know how to comply, deny and make no reply and you’ve read up to this point – know this – –>

You’re attachment to your own identity [of manhood] and your inability to accept that women have minds and bodies of their own is what creates ALL the problems you have with women everywhere.

And if you’ve read this far and you’re not a man who expects women to comply, deny and make no reply I thank you.

I also encourage you to call your brothers out when you see them doing or saying wrong to women.

It doesn’t have to be a knock down drag out fight. Just a few calm words that say it’s not okay.

Speaking up will go a loooong way to making other men realize women deserve respect.

Women need you to speak up against your brothers. Women can’t do it alone.

In 2018, men and women are meant to live inclusively and connected in a way that is unlike any other time in history.

Let’s do this together. Thank you.

Have a sensual day, Dyann xoxo

bridgesbodywork@ymail.com