These are a Few Actionable Suggestions To Get Over A Break Up and Help You Start Healing.
Breaking up is terrible. It hurts all the time over an extended period of time.
There are some things you can do, but you must be diligent.
It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it. Hang in there!
Below is the video and below that is the transcript…
Transcript How To Heal After A Break Up…
Welcome to another edition of the Bridges Bulletin. Let’s get started.
Hello, this is Dyann Bridges creator of the Relaters Manual and coach for men.
Today I’m going to be discussing how you can get over a breakup.
Breakups are very painful things. It feels like a physical assault.
Even though you may be a healthy person there are a lot of physical things going on. during a break up.
It’s deeply disturbing to our physiology and to our psychology when we break up with someone we’ve been very bonded to and connected to.
One of the best ways I know of, to get over a breakup and to start to heal again, is to try and look at it from a distance.
If possible, I know that’s difficult, but human beings are supposed to bond.
We’re supposed to have relationships and we’re supposed to care about each other .
In fact, intimate romantic relationships actually help us grow more than probably most any other relationship.
We don’t get triggered in the same way as other types of relationships. Certain issues don’t even surface when we’re not in an intimate relationship with someone.
So these things arise, so that we can deal with them and get to know ourselves better. Understand ourselves and understand life and people better.
So if you find yourself in the middle of a breakup, that other person has given you a gift in a way.
They’ve spent their time and energy with you and they’ve cared about you too.
Even though it may not always look like you or feel like it.
If we look at it in the simplest terms it can help you heal.
When you break down a relationships it’s mostly just communication.
If you speak English and your partner speaks German you’re not going to be able to share a lot with them.
When you speak English and they speak German, well, you might be able to have a few sexual experiences and maybe find a way to order a meal.
However, beyond that you’re not going to get to know each other unless you share a common language.
So communication really is what relationships are all about.
Next…
What is good communication or bad communication?
It’s all about boundaries. Yours and theirs.
So, knowing your boundaries is critical and that way you can communicate without violating someone else’s boundaries too.
Or maybe you overstep somebody else’s boundaries accidentally… or intentionally.
This is part of relating.
These are all things that you learn only within the confines of an intimate romantic relationship.
So, if you can step back and start to see how you learned about communicating with somebody else, who you really cared about and who you were intimate with, you can start to see how much you learned.
Give yourself a break and start to notice what you learned about yourself and your boundaries.
What did you learn about the other person as an individual, but also as the opposite sex? That’s vitally important.
There’s always generalities between the sexes even when you’re dealing with individuals.
So, part of the healing is being able to step back a little bit and be a good friend to yourself.
Start to see what you actually learned.
What did you give? Where did you go wrong? Did they go wrong somewhere? Where you may have stepped over a boundary? Did they step over a boundary with you?
Get clearer on who you are and how to communicate.
That way you’ll be better prepared for your next love affair!
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