Gentlemen, it’s time you guys started taking responsibility for your own desires.
It’s not so much about blame as it is about self-awareness.
Men just don’t seem to examine their own behavior as readily as women do.
Again… no blame. Just awareness.
I consider it part of my job as a legit sensual massage therapist to point out where my all male clientele is coming up short… so to speak. 🙂
Case in point; The RELUCTANCE TO GIVE A CELL PHONE NUMBER: This is big.
I often get guys calling who get cagey about giving me a cell number or call with a blocked number. Why?
The guys who are honest will tell me their cellphone carrier records the calls and texts they make which means their wife may ask about the number when she sees the bill.
Or they confess that their wife or girlfriend will go through their phone and check for unidentified numbers and then have “a talk”. I get it.
Now, it’s important to understand why I ask for a cell phone number. The ONLY reason is, if need be, we can communicate while you’re on route.
Why? Because stuff happens.
You get stuck in traffic or the client before you is really late and I’m trying to accommodate both of you or sometimes there’s a mix up with the room scheduling or whatever.
That’s it. It’s business. It’s not personal. Truly. I wish you well, but I’m not interested in your personal life.
I find it odd some of you guys actually think it is personal. The thought that I might be interested in you because… why exactly?
Real Life Example; A first time client came to visit me. He didn’t seem like a bad guy, but was extremely nervous on arrival.
That happens. Many of you guys show up nervous, struggling with your guilt and sense of anticipation. That’s fine.
I will say he didn’t strike me as terribly attractive physically or smart or charismatic either. That’s fine. The session went off without a hitch though, but the trouble came later.
I erroneously thought this client had called me later the next day. So, I called back and left a message… the first time.
I called a second time (thinking he had called again) and just hung up when there was no answer. Why did I do this?
Because… I accidentally bumped his number (two different times) while talking to another client. Damn touch screens.
I called him thinking he had called me, but when there was no answer on his end, I forgot about it.
The next morning this client called me in an irate state asking why I had called. Twice. How dare I.
So, I told him I thought he had called me and that it was a mistake. He demanded more info because his wife had asked him about the unrecognized number.
I told him there was nothing more to it.
He then demanded I delete his number from my phone. I said “No problem” and have a good day.
I could actually feel a mild wave of shock through the phone.
He seemed surprised I didn’t put up more of a fight about the deletion request. Why would I? Because I was attracted to him? Really? Come on.
Do us both a favor and just get a damn burner cell.
I offer this example because it’s not an isolated incident. Although, the clients change.
Sometimes it’s guys in business suits who think I’m looking for a rich boyfriend.
Sometimes it’s gym rats or ‘hood boys or students or desk jockeys who think I’m looking for some young guy to sleep with. Really? Come on. Get a burner cell!
It doesn’t matter so much where you guys come from. It has everything to do with where you’re coming from within your own minds, hearts, perspectives and attitudes toward women.
So, I would implore you to take a look at yourselves first before you point a finger at a lady.
This is not so much an admonition as it is a suggestion to raise your level of self-awareness. Remember, it’s part of my job. 🙂
Now, what have we gained here?
Number ONE: Understand that booking an appointment with a female provider of sensual or erotic services is her JOB.
It’s your personal time but she’s on the clock. She’s taking a much bigger risk than you are so, please be cognizant of that… (and get a burner cell) :O
Real Life Example: I’ve known two female providers personally who have been arrested by an under cover cop.
Both times the cop posing as client, got their number from Backpage.com. Not only that, they were both working for an agency at the time which one would think would be safer. No such luck in these two cases.
Backpage.com is where I do most of my advertising and where most of my clients find me. This is precisely why I am cautious and very picky about who I let into my sessions.
Not only that, but I personally have been run out of town (in NW Westchester) by GOSSIP.
Some of you know the story. If you know the story you know how dangerous judgement and tongue wagging can be. I was in and out of that space in a month.
Now, tell me how many male clients do you know who have been questioned, let alone arrested for using a sensual body rub service?
I don’t know any nor have I ever heard or read about a client being arrested.
So perhaps the next time you think a sensual provider is contacting you for personal reasons, think again. She might just be doing her job. 🙂
Thank you for reading and have a very sensual day! Dyann xoxo
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