This is a short podcast segment examining the difference between aggression or assertiveness.
There is a difference and it makes a BIG difference in relating to others.
TRANSCRIPT OF ‘Aggression vs Assertiveness’
Today we’re talking about aggression versus assertiveness and exactly what that means for both men and women. What does that look like exactly being assertive or being aggressive let’s find out.
This is Dyann Bridges and this is the Body House Chronicles. Let’s get started. First I want to quickly apologize and explain that I’m a little bit froggy today. It sounds worse than it is but we press on.
Here we go…
First let’s start by defining what’s assertive and what’s aggressive. What does that look like exactly and what does it feel like and what kind of responses does someone get from man or a woman depending on whether they’re being aggressive or assertive.
Now in my experience being aggressive means sort of crossing a line between being passionate about something and getting angry. Allowing anger to be infused in whatever point you’re trying to make then it comes across as aggressive. So I guess the line is crossing over into anger.
Now for men in general they can get away with a little bit more that way displaying a little more anger and therefore aggression in their viewpoints. Women not so much and I think both men and women give men that leeway. This is part of the masculine and feminine way.
Men have more natural instincts to be territorial and to fight. Women have more natural instincts to want to harmonize and connect in general. This is true.
We see it everywhere. It’s been true throughout the ages.
Assertiveness on the other hand is a type of passion and intensity that shows that you have energy and intention in what you’re saying, but there’s a measure of grace. You get your point across in a dignified
manner and that’s far superior to any type of aggression.
There’s really no need for aggression except in the great minority of situations and there’s very few events that arise where it isn’t prudent to be graceful and exercise dignified assertiveness before you have to engage in any type of aggression.
That’s especially true for women.
Mostly because women are much more graceful beings in general. It’s the way our bodies are shaped and
it’s the way we move. A woman’s energy and spirit is much more sensual. It’s geared toward harmonization and connecting which means it’s within a woman’s best interest to be graceful. And not aggressive only when you absolutely have to be which is rare.
Now what does it feel like to get aggressive?
Well quite simply, I would think it’s that moment where you realize you’ve lost control of your emotions. For both men or women you know when you’ve come up to the line and you’re speaking in a passionate way and then when you step over that line you lost control. You’ve gone into anger.
I’d like to think it’s time now that we have an understanding or appreciation for using more maturity in our approach to dealing with others. For women that means using more grace and not being tempted to cross that line to anger and getting aggressive. Because it doesn’t serve us. It makes us less, much less.
I know because I’ve seen that in my own life.
We just can’t get away with anger and aggression like men can. It makes women much more one-dimensional. Men are simpler creatures than women are and there’s nothing wrong with that. This
is the way it’s supposed to be. That’s not a derogatory statement. Tt’s supposed to be this way.
Women are more complex. We have more mystery. Women hold the void. We need to be more responsible.
Which means handling ourselves with more grace integrity and maturity.
Everyone’s human. We’re going to slip and make mistakes, but having a philosophy where you think it’s strong to allow yourself to continuously step over that line into anger and aggression is inaccurate and rather foolish.
So, in light of this, I hope you see the wisdom in being assertive and not allowing your anger to take over and become aggressive. You can still get your point across. People may still be disrespectful or not
listen to you, but either way you’ve stayed in control. You haven’t let them trigger your anger.
You haven’t let them allow you to rise to aggression which is a lower form of dealing with anything unless you have to defend yourself if it’s a battle of ideas then being assertive and staying dignified and graceful is more than enough and let the chips fall where they may
Thank you for reading (and listening). Have a very sensual day.
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