The Body House

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The Art of Negotiating With a Bodyrub Provider

The Art of Negotiating With a Bodyrub Provider

Many men feel it’s acceptable to begin negotiating with a bodyrub provider right from the word “Go.”

Many women who do this work have come to expect it. If it’s your first time booking with me however, I consider it bad form.

For those of you who like negotiating with a bodyrub provider let me ask you this: Do you try to negotiate with your doctor, lawyer or dentist? What about your car mechanic?

Would you negotiate the price of a meal at a restaurant? Am I being ridiculous to compare a sensual massage with any of the above services? I don’t think so.

It could be argued that many men spend as much (if not more so) on sensual services in a year as they would on either their dentist or doctor, lawyer or even a mechanic.

With some of you, that amount would surpass all the other services combined.

I take my work very seriously. I’m a professional just as much as the above providers are in their respective fields. Perhaps it’s just perception. Perhaps it’s because the aforementioned providers have many more years of schooling.

Does that make my profession any less professional? I don’t think so. Not if I’m running it like a professional business it’s not.

It’s disappointing, this tendency toward negotiating with a bodyrub provider.

It lowers the professional experience for both of us. And… it happens to me fairly regularly.

In fact, just the other day a young man called to book an appointment at the Manhattan location. He sounded nice enough and solid about the appointment.

So, I booked the room for the hour. I also mentioned to him that if he canceled or didn’t show up there is a fee for me. He seemed fine with that.

However, within minutes after I booked the room and sent him the address of the building he sent a text asking if I could come down on the price. I told him I can’t really negotiate as I still have the room charge to pay for.

Now, he’s put me in a very difficult position. I don’t know him. He’s a first time client. I have no personal or business reason to give him a break on the price just because he asked.

Especially, since he did it AFTER he booked the appointment.

Now I’ve got to decide whether to yes to a steep drop in price or no and possibly lose the appointment all together.

In the end, I opted NOT to negotiate. He canceled the appointment.

I was lucky though. The owner of the room let it go as I canceled within minutes after I booked the room.

Otherwise, I would not only have missed a massage appointment I would have had to pay a room charge. Perhaps that was a bad business decision on my part? I can live with it. The up side was I MADE my point.

The point being; I’m not obligated to do anything for my clients that is outside the scope of what I advertise for.

I’m comfortable with my boundaries. I will give you as much as I possibly can within those parameters.


Here’s another example, just before Christmas last year, one gentleman tried to employ the art of negotiating with a bodyrub provider via bartering. Apparently, he owned a store where he sold designer bags, shoes, scarves and other ladies accessories.


He approached me with “in the spirit of the season” mentality as it was close to the holidays. Part of me wanted to help him out as he had described his business as “recently fallen on hard times.” The trouble was I didn’t need a new bag or shoes or anything else he was pedaling.

Yet, there was something in his attitude. It suggested he thought I should be falling over myself to give him a massage in exchange for his fashion accessories.

Remember, I don’t know this man. He called me.

I wasn’t particularly interested, but I wanted to give him a chance. So, I asked for pictures of the merchandise. The first picture he sent was of a designer bag. It was… well… atrocious.

It might have been bad lighting, but I didn’t care for the pukey green color, the excessive shininess of the material and whopping price tag.

He alluded to the fact that just one of my massage sessions wouldn’t have equalled half the cost of the purse.

Apparently, it was to die for. I wouldn’t have risked a paper cut for it.

Next came the shoes that sounded like they’d be too small for me. He insisted they would fit. I wasn’t about to offer an hour of my valuable service to find out.

Finally, he sent pictures of exquisite, hand dyed silk scarves. They were beautiful. However, they were almost too nice for my lifestyle. I was afraid I might ruin them. I thought I may be able to sell them online. That was a serious option… and it might have been IF his attitude had remained humble.

The problem was, the more I resisted the more his attitude changed.

It got to the point where he gave me the definite impression there was something wrong with me because I wasn’t bending over backwards to offer my services to get his items.

How dare I not need a designer bag or silk scarf. What kind of woman was I?

At that point I wished him Merry Christmas and was done with it.

Most recently, was the young photographer who texted me asking to exchange my services for his.

Well, I could have used new pics, but I’m picky about who takes them. Bottom line, I didn’t know this young man.

I don’t like giving up my work for no cash unless it’s for a real friend or for something I know I want and need. The fact remains, I owed these men nothing.

So, the next time you’re thinking about practicing the art of negotiating with a bodyrub provider… Don’t.

In the end, it just lowers the experience for both of you and there’s a good chance you won’t get what you want in return anyway.

Thank you and have a very sensual day, Dyann. xoxo


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