This was first written in 2016. Much of it has to do with a man’s assumptions and suspicions about women and how that interferes with real communication.
However, many things have changed since 2016. Sadly, it seems that both men and women – have become much more suspicious in general.
We’ve got to learn the difference between suspicion and intuition.
*The following is a conversation I had with a male friend. I hadn’t known him for that long, but we had some good conversations. Here goes…..*
{Video at the very end}
One day we were chatting and I said to him, “No, you don’t know women.”
I was describing the main topic of my blog to a man, just the other day, when I felt compelled to point this out. Men don’t know women.
Granted this man was the kind of man who enjoys the company of women and is never long without a date. He has a close relationship with his sister and mother too. And frankly, I don’t know him that well.
None of this matters, however. I had to correct his assumption that he knew women well. My assertion of, “No, you don’t know women” was met with an incredulous look.
As if I didn’t know what I was talking about. Funny that. I, the woman, was given an incredulous look by him, the man, who believed he understood women. What did I know?
Understand, this incredulous man is ruggedly handsome, not married and around 40. He doesn’t brag much, but I think he gets around and does well with the ladies. Hence, his incredulity.
I would argue that he understands what works with women. He might understand what women respond to, but he doesn’t know what makes us tick.
This is the truth. Gentlemen, please accept that. It will make all our lives easier when you do.
Think of it like this; to make a wall clock work you know you need to stick a AA sized battery in the back of it. Next, turn the hands to the correct position and the count down begins. Men who think they understand women, know how and where to put the battery (so to speak).
The trouble is they don’t understand the mechanics of how the clock actually ticks away the minutes.
There’s a big difference.
This incredulous man may think he knows women because it’s easy for women to be around him. He is physically very muscular, yet he doesn’t have the slightest whiff of aggression about him. Not verbally and certainly not physically. Too many men do.
So, it’s nice to come across a guy who’s relaxed enough in his own manhood that a woman can relax with him too. Unfortunately, he made a common mistake. Some men think they understand women because they can talk their way into sleeping with her or dating her… at least for a few months.
Or perhaps they have a number of female friends and think this gives them an insider’s edge. I’m being a bit cynical, but my point is that just because a man can elicit friendly, sensual, sexual or nurturing behavior from a woman doesn’t mean he knows what really drives a woman at the deepest core. How could he?
Granted… there is a lot about this man I don’t know. I suspect however, he has never really let a woman into his heart on the deepest level. I’m sure he’s been in love, most of us have. That doesn’t mean a lover touched your heart in the deepest way. There are many reasons for that. Anyway, I just don’t see him having had a great love. A deep love.
Aye, and there’s the rub. To truly know women a man must allow at least one woman into his heart as deeply and completely as possible.
Your mothers don’t count.
ONLY when you’ve allowed your heart to be touched in this way can you truly understand what women (in general) want. That’s because you’ve had the opportunity to connect so deeply with one woman. You can now understand all of us better. This takes tremendous courage on a man’s part. Love is not for the faint of heart.
The guys who come to see me for my sensual massage sessions, the ones who’ve been married for awhile, tend to readily admit they don’t know much about women. Why is that? Because they’ve experienced first hand how the women they know and love the most still confound them.
Guys who think they know women because they frequently date and score, tend to be players or just playing around. They don’t have the emotional maturity yet to understand what makes women tick.
To let a woman into your heart deeply — deeply enough so that she will be completely honest and extremely vulnerable with you takes dedication, obligation and commitment. Very often it takes years of truly intimate conversation and daily observation to appreciate where a woman is coming from.
It takes a certain strength and generosity for a man to get to this point. Something has to cross over inside him. He has to want to open his heart. This incredulous man is not there… yet.
He needs to be more conscious and self aware. As do many men. Heck, as we all do. Why else are we here?
So, I will continue to say, “No, you don’t know women,” and then help you guys to understand us a little better.
I can only hope you develop enough self awareness and consciousness to let a woman into the deepest parts of your heart.
Picking Up the Slack – Men Calling Out Other Men
Yes, it’s that palpable and that common.
I myself (a woman of middle years) have experienced this and have also watched it happen. I’ve seen men eye young attractive women on the street like predators. Not unlike thieves scoping out a property to rob. Penetrating stares which expose their active lust.
Get More Sex & Understand Women Better From One of The Best Consultants I’ve Ever Found…
That’s where you guys come in (check out another post on “self-assessment”).
Remember this is the world that men built.
Remember too, that women are here to inspire, delight and offer support and partnership for you.
Call him out. I dare you to. I implore you to.
Why not say something like, “Let it go, man. She’s not interested. And what’s more, she doesn’t have to be.” Or “Is that any way to talk to a lady?” Then watch the look of shock ripple across his face. Be prepared too… for a verbal exchange or even a physical altercation.
Thank you for your interest in Dyann’s content ALL Links – https://linktr.ee/bodyhouse1
Contact Dyann at: thebodyhouse.biz@gmail.com
Discover More Sensual Relating Advice
Relationship SAVING HUG – Soulmate Embrace {FREE eBook}Celebrate Vintage Sensuality with us:
https://bodyhousechronicles.substack.com
If the video doesn’t play please click the link {https://youtu.be/FAgrCoVuCRA}